ERROR IS A GREAT WAY TO ACCESS THIS BEING OF TALENT THAT WE ALL ARE.
THE CREATIVE ACT HELPS ME TO DELIVER MYSELF FORM MY FOOD OBSESSION. HOW TO LEARN TO LISTEN OUR REAL NEEDS?
Reveal our age became as taboo as confess our weight or own annual salary. I'm always please to gain years, progress toward more wisdom. I'm very please today to celebrate my 34 years old. However in spite of all those years of training, there are always those same mistakes that we keep repeating, the ones which we know destroy us and slow down our progress.
Einstein said : "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
We are all crazy! My insanity? Eating too much. No need to be over weight to continually think about food. Like a drug addict I think about my fix all day long, until the emotional void, superficially satisfied, stuns me. The weight gain tires me, demotivate me, and slow down my race toward what I aspire to be ; a vicious circle difficult to break down.
How to transform the error, this obsession that hurts us, which is none other than a simple unconscious action of our daily life, a real way to access to this talented being that we are? This is what I consider the real challenge of our life.
My last diet dates of my teenage year, I weighed myself twice a day every day. Not the right move! Today it is more a way of life that I'm trying to instaure. The main obstacle is to eat differently from others, at different time in different quantity and always hear critics on my surrounding, which are mainly fears of this unconscious collectif worried to have to take charge of themselves individually. For me there are as many way of eating that there are individuals. But it is always more comforting to follow the crowd and complain together than learn to listen our real needs. Next, it is the daily fight with ourselves that we have to deal with, all those excuses which comes to seduce us, deceive us and convince us to make the same mistakes that we did in the past, and therefore take us away from our real potential.
The spikes of this rolla costa ease each years. However, in spite of the promise I made to myself a long time ago, I go back on the last judgment scale to discover a weight never reached before 72kg. Around 10-15 kilos took in 2-3 months. What does this means? Not much. I'm starting to understand that those cursed numbers aren't the reflection of any failure or success. The fact that my mind get more and more freedom to let space to photography, and the need desire to share my experience with others, is a real progress, but that one, not measurable. Therefore I can only be juge on my advancement.
I still need to learn to listen my soul, greedy of new shared experiences. Food is only a fuel, an energy source that I try to canalise into creative actions. The road is still long but my errors are a great alarm to indicate that I'm on the wrong track. Once again I will have to reaffirm my priorities, face my fears and canalised all this surplus energy stored by taking back rapidly the road of freedom. My creative soul is hungry!